What love means?

गौरी के साथ खड़े होने के लिए 

शिव होना पड़ता है 

गंगा को भी धरना हो तो 

गंगाधर होना ज़रूरी है

(बनना नहीं, होना) 

कृष्ण को तो 

राधा भी नहीं मिलती। 

#StrengthOfCharacter 

In Indian mythology, Shiva stands for steadfastness, lack of guile, and straightforward communication. 

Shiva, who was not ostentatious, had Shakti herself perform penance to have him as her husband. 

When she jumped into the fire of her father's sacred yagya, a distraught Shiva carried her body until the Gods were forced to intervene. Every place that a part of her body fell, is a Shaktipeeth temple (a seat of power). 

Shiva is not known to have any other wives. 

Krishna stands for demonstrative, evident, but non-exclusive love. In mythology, Krishna has 8 wives, 16,000 consorts, but not Radha. 

The piece is trying to say that for a worthy woman to choose you, you have to be worthy on the inside. You cannot try to be a person worth having. You have to inherently BE that person. A person who is demonstrative can become folklore, but cannot have the love in real life. That takes demonstrated character every single day. 

For someone to trust you (Ganga trusted Shiva to hold and support her as she descends from the heavens to Earth), you have to BE trustworthy. You cannot learn it, you have to BE it. 

Was talking to some colleagues and the question came up - what does love mean to you? Hence the title. 

Dear Canva 

My Teams Pro subscription expired primarily because I just wasn't using you enough. 

You discontinued the Teams package altogether and upped the cost to 5x for the same work. Not bad. 

There is no customer support to talk to. So, no, not gonna sign up. 

The desktop app is a very nice touch. Not needed, but nice touch. 

The way you deleted all my content, however, is another story.  

The difference between having a human to talk to and not having a human to talk to - is the subscription revenue of folks who don't really need your service, but take it all the same. And customers who wanted to talk to someone before moving to competition (which, by the way, is free).  

Regards

Currently-Disgruntled-Ex-Customer 

On the BRICS Summit and other random thoughts

 

Only one of these 2 headlines is correct. In case there was any confusion, it is the second one. The PM of India got Xi Jinping to India, and then raised to his face, the issue of weaponising rare earth minerals. 

I don't think people have quite understand the magnitude of what happened at the BRICS Summit, so let me lay it out a little bit. 

1. Xi Jinping and Putin are two global leaders who are on the target list of every terror orgn and state led assassination agencies (except, perhaps, N Korea). These leaders do not "tour". Their security is a 24*7*365 race. 

India managed to bring these and other global leaders on a single stage, managed their security, without any incident. If RAW needed a coming of age certificate, this is IT. 

2. These leaders also do not issue statements. They do not share their thoughts. Ever. They are intensely private and very action oriented. 

These leaders came to a central platform and issued a JOINT, consensual statement with India, Iran, and other countries. These countries do not always see eye to eye on the global stage. India did this under clear and present threat of US Sanctions. Getting these leaders to SPEAK, and issue a joint statement, is not something that is easily achieved. 

Putin, as usual, slayed in one sentence - BRICS is 40% of the world's GDP, G7 is 29%. Why do they call themselves "great". 

3. The issue is not the use of the term G7 or % of GDP being the only metric for a country's economy. The issue is - the world has been benefitting purely from spotlight for a long time. When you remove the greasepaint, the substance beneath the paint has to be good. And more people are asking - Is it?

Is as much as the spotlight is on BRICS and who is in the room, it is also, imho, on the people who were NOT in that room. 

Completely off-topic:

As a random person, this week, my thoughts took me to a very different tangent - many great economies have been undone by democracy, but none as much as the UK. Yet, in ancient India, democracy was the norm. The janapadas were the first known political system. As the size and complexity grew, they had to move to monarchies and central control with ONE person. There were checks and balances - the Rajguru whose curse scared even the king, the group of ministers who exuded the same pressure that Gandhi exuded on the British. 

What, then, is the future of democracies like India and the US? These are great countries. And democracy is easily the best political system for the people. So, why do these two not lead to synergy? In Switzerland, by contrast, direct democracy has led to a country that is efficient, well-regulated, and extremely rich. What did Switzerland do so right that the rest of the world can learn from? How can we make democracy relevant, and also powerful? 

We are not the same

You read the AI generated summary of a research paper and then share it, expound on it, and use it to base an argument. 

I read the first 5 paragraphs of the paper and realise that: 

A.  The Sample is inadequate (2676 people representing 1.4 bn)

B. The sample is also incredibly skewed (one population group comprising 75% of population while paper claiming to represent the entire universal set of study) 

C. The stratification employed is irrelevant. 

We are not the same. 

PS: 

1. If you use a paper to base an entire argument, at least read the damn paper. When I call you out on it, don't say - eyes hurt, can't read more at the moment.  

2. Do NOT come to me with AI generated content. We can ALL tell AI content from the first 2 paragraphs. If i wanted to know what AI thinks, I would ask the AI. 

The Poverty Mindset (On Poverty - II)

This is the second part. The first part of the post is here. 

So, in doing some fieldwork, I have noticed a few things that ARE common to families that either remain in poverty, or enter poverty from a more affluent class. 

The Victim Mindset and...

This is the TOP common denominator. EVERYONE who remains in poverty has expressed deep anguish at being wronged - the agent of wrongdoing varies - the state, the community, the world, the family. But they are ALL victims. They have been wronged by the world. 

BUT not everyone who has a victim mindset remains poor. There is one more factor which has to be added to the mix - they truly believe that the wrong must be recompensed before they can do anything. I call this the victimhood paralysis - they find that they are unable/unwilling to act until the wrong done to them has been "corrected" or they have been somehow compensated. 

Entitlement

The second common factor is - they feel entitled to abuse - public infrastructure, other people. I stop people who are spitting and ask them - Why did you spit here? 

Some of them express surface level remorse. Only a few stop to really think. Most of them look at me like i am an alien. To them, defacing public property is the most natural thing to do. Their answer is the same as Hillary's answer to "Why climb a mountain?" - Because it is there!

And then I notice that in my most underprivileged contacts, the same mindset extends to people. They do not feel bad about abusing their network for short term gain, then wonder why they have "no friends" and why "no one supports them" 

Maybe there are more factors. But this is what I know so far. Every time I meet someone underprivileged, I ask "Why is this family poor?" (Because poverty is not an individual phenomenon. One is not poor alone. The lowest unit of poverty is the family. If one person gets out of poverty, they may get out alone. But if one person in the family becomes poor, the whole immediate family definitely follows suit.) 

On poverty - I

I am going to get brickbats for this one. 

Recently, i was at a railway station. India now has brilliant public infrastructure. The railway station was no exception. 

We have to climb stairs to reach platforms. At least 5 people walking in front of me spat or littered on their way to the platform. Without a care. 

And that anger led to a tsunami of processing data points that have been silently accumulated over decades. 

********** 

In 1947, Muslims from India reached Pakistan but instead of being welcomed, they were labelled Muhajirs. 

Hindus and Sikhs who managed to reach India alive were rich in their towns and villages (you had to be rich enough to pay for safe passage and reach this side alive, that is why every Punjabi in Delhi had grandparents who spoke about being wealthy. They were), but were put here in refugee camps in squalor, food itself being a luxury doled out at infrequent intervals. 

But, in 2004, the president of Pakistan was a Muhajir, and the Prime Minister of India was a refugee. 

They were not exceptional - on both sides of the border, the communities of these "refugees" had done well financially. 

********** 

In the 1960s -1970s India, lakhs of young men and women left homes for PSU jobs, govt jobs, IIT education, IIM education. They went on to reach "escape velocity" from poverty. 

********* 

When we speak about poverty, we address it as a single story - poverty is a result of circumstances out of an individual's control. It is a result of the evil capitalistic/oligarchic/regal system, which rely/ies on suppressing the poor for the benefit of the rich. 

Here is what is wrong with that single story: 

1. There ISN'T a single story of poverty. Poverty is a multi-headed hydra. There isn't a single cause of poverty. 

2. The narrative of capitalism/oligarchy/monarchy being solely responsible for poverty comes from socio-economic structures that truly did not have space for what is now called the "middle classes" - people who fill the middle role through education or specialised skill. In India, which was a mercantile civilisation from the start, trade was a good way to reach the middle class and this class has been a ubiquitous feature of our civilisation. 

3. There are people who exit poverty and take their families along. There are people who exit but do not take the family along. And then there are families that stay in the same loop - generation after generation. And families that enter the loop - from one of the "upper" classes. We know what helps those who reach escape velocity - education, enterprise, opportunity, community, etc. We never ask - what, if anything, is common to families that remain poor? Why is a poor person poor? 

************** 

So, let's ask the question - Why is a poor person poor? 

And i call this, the Poverty mindset. 

More in the next post. 

2 thoughts on relationships

 1. 

The currency of a relationship is not money, address, or education. It is how well two people communicate, how valued they make each other feel - communication, respect, love, passion, chemistry? 

With age, the relative importance of biodata elements like money, title, education etc. reduces even more. Now all we need is someone to sit with, someone to talk to, and someone to trust/lean on. 

In youth, what is important is - will this person stand up for you? Will they support or criticise you when you fail, or lose a job, or hit a wall? Will they lend a hand in the backbreaking work of raising a family while managing finances, relatives, expectations? Or will they stand on the side and guilt trip you? 

Yet, we continue to evaluate potential partners on currencies that are not completely valid. Educational compatibility is a good indicator of some other things - like a non medico may not understand the idea of 36 hour shifts. But it can lead to false positives and false negatives - not all medicos will get it, and its not that only medicos will get it. They may not have lived 36 hour shifts, but they see you do them and see you come home exhausted. 

2. In offices, when doing DEI trainings, we almost always present a variant of this picture: 

Yet, when talking to our partners, we expect equality - I value honesty, so I must offer honesty. I value time spent together doing things, so I must offer to do things my partner enjoys, even if I dont like them that much. 

But quid pro quo rarely works. Love your partner the way they want to be loved, not the way you want to love. And ask to be loved in a way that works for you. 

In a relationship, equity means - the ability to love the way your partner wants, and the security to ask to be loved in the way your heart desires. 

To borrow from St. Francis of Assisi: 

To be understood, as to understand. 

Sometimes, I do say good stuff

 This was posted on a reading group by the admin: 

My response: 

Book Summaries have been around since at least 2001. The issue is not that book summaries are available. 

It is with the core idea that authors and editors waste words. They don't. Everything that is in the book deserved to be there. 

So when you read a distillation, you get the essence the same way that tea leaves are the essence of tea. They are, but without the extras, they are quite... useless. 

Imagine Thomas Hardy without the description. Rashmirathi without the rhyming. Jane Austen without the love letters. Poirot without "Eh, Bien." Sherlock without 221B. Premchand without "Kisi prakaar koi heela na hua." 

******* 

In other news, mental health has some good days now. 

No feminist please, we are Indian

On social media, one encounters "No feminist please" more and more. 

Something like this ad: 

This got me thinking. What is it about trad wives that men want, and why are women not willing to be trad wives.

A good starting point, of course, was to just list what a traditional marriage looks like. 

In a traditional Indian marriage: 

What traditional Indian wives do: 

1. Cook (with help) 

2. Clean (oversee the help) 

3. Raise kids (with support from other women in the house or family) 

4. Ensure that all family celebrations are taken care of. Everyone has the gift that they deserve, all family equations are maintained. 

5. Host visiting relatives. 

6. Host friends of children. 

7. Organise children's birthday parties. 

8. Know the preferences of everyone in the family and ensure a fair balance between junk and healthy eating. 

9. Socialise with their friends or relatives after sending the kids and husband to their respective school/office. OR take a nap. 

10. Get up in the morning to ensure kids get to school, husband gets to work. 

11. Settle the house at night before going to bed. 

12. Give chai to the husband once he comes back from work. 

13. Attend all family functions and perform the work expected. Ensuring that the function goes off smoothly, assisting mother in law or the eldest daughter in law in doing the function. 

14. Teaching children all about our epics, our traditions, and performing the pooja in the family temple every day. 

15. Never drink or smoke in public. 

16. Manage the household and make the list of supplies that the husband must get every month from the ration shop. 

17. Wear only Indian clothes in the house. (nightie exempted) 

18. Touch the feet of visiting elders. 

19. On all matters of finance, defer to the husband. 

20. No work outside the house. Volunteer or something only when it doesn't interfere with family responsibilities. 

21. Learn the traditions of the marital family and perpetuate them. This includes their food habits, their religious observance, their family celebrations, and the way they communicate with each other. 

22. Bear children within 2 years of marriage. 

What traditional Indian husbands do: 

1. Be the sole breadwinner. Never taking a penny from the wife. 

2. Give their salary to the wife at the start of each month for her to manage the family's finances. 

3. Bring groceries on their way home from office. 

4. After freshening up and drinking his chai, sit with the kids to complete their homework while the wife cooks dinner for the family. 

5. Take wife along on all social events. Not being able to attend any social event without the wife. 

6. Participate in all functions on the in-laws side. 

7. During summers, when the wife visits her parents for a few weeks, go to drop her and then go to pick her up. Spending at least one night at the in-laws' place on both occasions. 

8. Take wife, parents, and kids to the doctor whenever the need arises. 

9. Perform routine repairs in the house or cause them to be done. 

10. Touch parents' feet every morning and night if they are in a joint family. 

11. Take wife and kids to an outing every Sunday, spending time with them and making memories. 

12. Take family to the kids' PTM, annual day function, school picnic etc. Drop the children and pick them up. 

13. Buy the monthly ration based on the list given by Shri mati ji. 

14. On all matters of how the house will be run, what will be bought, what gifts will be given, and how the house will be decorated, defer to the wife. 

15. Be home straight after office, no hobnobbing with male friends after work, and no working late into the night. 

16. No speaking to any bhabhiji without the wife being present. Absolutely no calls or messages from female colleagues on one's phone. 

17. With or without kids, never reaching home drunk. Ever. 

18. Gifting wife a piece of gold jewelry at all important occasions like birthday and anniversary. 

19. Making financial and investment decisions for the family's secure future. 

20. Ensuring that all family poojas are conducted by the couple jointly, as mandated by Hinduism (and most Indic religions). 

21. Have children within 2 years of marriage. 

Notice something? 

Many of the duties of a trad husband do not get done at all. 

The things on the wife's plate are more or less exactly as they were. 

Many things from the husband's plate are now on the wife's plate. 

2 lessons for me here: 

1. I understand why women are turning "feminist" 

2. When men ask for trad wives, are they also ready to be trad husbands? Because that is how that system works. 

What do you think? 

Goodbye to the Salim-Javed ideology - Once more

I was raised on the Salim-Javed brand of communist manifesto cinema in India - in which the poor are good just because they are poor and the rich are bad just because they are rich. Of course, if they are rich, they must be bloodsuckers and corrupt bribers because what other way is there to get rich? 

In 1991, India had to physically ship its gold just to retain its financial sovereignty. One of the lowest points any country could see. No one said it then, but I can say it now - THAT low point was the result of the communist policies of our government from 1947 - 1990. What started as a welfare state soon turned into a pseudo communist state, and under Indira, the cultural colonisation of India was completed. (Watch Tashkent Files for details). 

But as one grew up, one realised that not all rich people are bad. In fact, in India. most people - rich or poor - definitely donate a percentage of their earnings to "something good". Common sense states that 10% of a larger pie will lead to a greater impact. 

And that is when the narrative of Salim - Javed fell through for me. The rich are not blood suckers. They are silent philanthropists. Not all of them are good. Not all of them are bad. The poor are not good just by virtue of being poor. They are poor also because they spend their money on alcohol and beat up their wives and kids. Some of them are hardworking and caught in a whirlpool of circumstances. But for many, many of them, the Salim-Javed narrative created a mental exit barrier out of poverty. They were led to believe that the poor have a support system for each other. Exiting poverty would lead to the end of that support system. 

Unfortunately, we now have a country that believes that being poor is a free pass to doing illegal things and getting away with it. 

We also have generations that believe that being poor is not their fault. They have no obligation to create wealth, educate their children, and work towards a wealthier future. And a large chunk of the population that believes it is the government's responsibility to take care of their education, health, and employment. That it is their right to steal electricity, grab land, and generally take advantage of public infrastructure. 

The welfare state may have been a Utopian idea, but it was an idea worth pursuing - one in which the rich can be rich and the poor would be supported.  

But one thing it cannot discount - individual accountability. The state owes you an electricity and clean water connection. But you need to pay for your consumption. The state owes you subsidised medical facilities - but you need to ensure that you use them responsibly. The state owes you subsidised food, but one needs to have smaller families that strive to get out of the poverty whirlpool. 

Is education the panacea? Are small families the best solution? No. there is no one best solution. There cannot be a universal cure. But the INTENT to move out of poverty - the idea of individual responsibility - that has to be universal. 

 

North India vs South India

Since the CONgress got voted in Karnataka and Telangana, there has been hajaar debate in India on North and South Indian voters and how North and South Indians are inherently different. 

So, I thought I might as well list a comparison between north and south Indians. 

Here goes: 

*****************

North Indians depend on their sons to take care of them in old age. 

South Indians depend on their sons to take care of them in old age. 

*********** 

North Indians do not educate their daughters so they can be married off easily. 

South Indians educate their daughters so they can be married off easily. 

********** 

North Indian films have women doing pelvic thrusts and gyrations to bawdy lyrics. 

South Indian films have women doing pelvic thrusts and gyrations to bawdy lyrics. 

********* 

North Indians believe that South Indians are strange. 

South Indians believe that North Indians are strange. 

*********** 

North Indians give dowry to their daughters. 

South Indians give dowry to their daughters. 

******** 

North Indians follow the caste + religion system. 

South Indians follow the caste + religion system. 

***************** 

North Indians believe in Mother Goddess in many forms - Vaishno. Durga, Amba... 

South Indians believe in Mother Goddess in many forms - Minakshi Ammal, Chamudeshwari, Mariyamma...

********** 

North Indian dalits+ converted buddhists want reservations. 

South Indian dalits + converted christians + converted buddhists + converted muslims want reservations. 

************ 

North Indians believe South Indians are space scientists or IITians. 

South Indians believe North Indians are businessmen or crooks. 

************* 

North Indians know Hindi and want to learn English. 

South Indians know English but don't want to learn Hindi. 

************* 

North Indians want daughters-in-law to adjust to their family and culture. 

South Indians want daughters-in-law to adjust to their family and culture. 

********************

North Indians love South Indian food as a specialty. 

South Indians love North Indian food as a specialty. 

******************** 

North Indian women wear sarees. Men wear dhotis. 

South Indian women wear sarees. Men wear veshtis (also a wraparound lower garment like the dhoti, but the South Indians think it is somehow more dignified than the North Indian version of wraparound). 

********* 

North Indian parents get their self-concept from children being obedient and successful in life. 

South Indians parents get their self-concept from children being obedient and successful in life. 

***************** 

North Indians spend lavishly at weddings and funerals, but the bulk of the expense goes towards feeding others. 

South Indians spend lavishly at weddings and funerals, but the bulk of the expense goes towards gold necklaces that are longer than the bride and groom. 

*********** 

North Indians go to a wedding to eat and gossip. 

South Indians go to a wedding to eat and gossip. 

************* 

North Indians break traffic rules when they can. 

South Indians break traffic rules when they think they can. 

************** 

North Indians are loud because they think they are God's gift to mankind. 

South Indians are soft-spoken because they think they are God's gift to mankind. 

************* 

North Indian men beat their wives. 

South Indian men beat their wives. 

********* 

North Indians vote for 'people like us' 

South Indians vote ONLY for 'people like us'. 

(Regional parties are far stronger in the Southern states) 

***************** 

North Indians think South India is hostile for young adults and North Indian young people. 

South Indians think North India is unsafe for women. 

************ 

North Indians think South Indians are well-educated. 

South Indians think North Indians are illiterate. 

****************** 

In short, they are both hypocrites, shallow, and generally xenophobic, racist, and painful. 

Being an Indian, I have lived in both - North and South. 

And my experience of both has been good or bad, independent of location. It has always been about the people. 

On a more serious note, i think the fact that South Indians only read English media, which is funded extensively by George Soros, and they have a much higher religious conversion rate than North India, has a lot to do with the victory of the Congress than any real manifesto reading. No one put that education to use reading any manifestos. 

************ 

On relationships

हम किसी की आमद से पहले, उसकी रुखसती की तैयारी करते हैं। 

तुम्हारी आदत पड़ गई तो? 

हमारी लड़ाई हो गई तो? 

तुमने शहर छोड़ दिया तो? 

क्या फायदा? 

दुख की तैयारी करने से, दुख हल्का नहीं होता। तब भी उतना ही दुखी करता है। दुख की तैयारी करने से, आज का सुख कम होता है। 

याद आ रही है? जा कर मिल आओ। 

लतीफा सुनाना है? सुना दो। 

Congratulations, ISRO, and Chandrayaan III

 Dear ISRO, in every way, you have made us proud today. 

Today is the day to celebrate our strengths. 

Tomorrow will be the day to build on them. 

Congratulations, India! 

********* 

"I'm over the moon!" has a new meaning for all Indians today.

20 years from now, scores of young scientists will be out there - sitting with friends, and gently remembering - THAT was the evening I decided, I am going to be a space scientist some day.

Thank you, ISRO, for giving us this moment of immense national pride.

Vikram (Sarabhai) did not just land on the moon that night. He also landed in the hearts of hundreds of children of India.

***************

We need an accountable Judiciary

 National Tragedies at the moment:

New Zealand: Earthquake

Peru: Floods

Turkey: Floods

Pakistan: Solvency

India: Lord Moonpower

The CJI of India has changed the format of the selection of the Chief Election Commissioner.

However, he has remained tightlipped about changing the Collegium system of the selection of judges.

The CJI has also insisted on a long winter break and a break for Holi even though the number of cases in Indian courts, including his own Supreme Court, is inexcusably high.

The duration of each case is interminable. The judges have literally ZERO obligation to the society they are meant to serve. They work on no metrics of public service. No judge is ever appraised on:

A. Whether the case went to appeal. - Every case that goes to appeal is basically a judge's failure to explain how their judgement is fair. The onus of explaining the fairness of their judgement is on the judge.

B. The average time taken to rule on a cases in their court.

C. Number of cases closed in a year.

The Executive and the Legislature have a national feedback mechanism every 5 years. But the judiciary enjoys the unacceptable privilege of ZERO feedback from those they are meant to serve - their fellow countrymen, and the litigants who come to them seeking justice.

The textbook definition of democracy is - A government OF the people, BY the people, FOR the people.

Judiciary is one of the three pillars of governance.

How can one pillar of governance remain so unaccountable to the people?

We, The People, need an accountable judiciary. We want judges to report on how many cases they closed, what was the appeal rate, how long they took on each case.

We want the selection process to the judiciary to be through a national competitive assessment center so that every judge in every District Court of the state has an equal chance to become a High Court Judge, and every High Court Judge has an equal chance to become a SC judge, and the senior most SC judge (by tenure as Supreme Court judge) becomes the CJI. No Collegium, No recommendation.

We also want the simplification of the impeachment process for judges.

The judiciary needs to have an annual review just like all other wings of the government.

If a judge repeatedly gives judgements that favour a specific cause, community, region, then such a judge is clearly ineligible to hold the seat of justice.

On the Assam crackdown on child marriages

In recent weeks, Assam, a state of India, has made 3000 arrests of people who were involved in child marriage. 

BUT suddenly, the woke junta started putting out news articles like how cruel they are to punish people who did child marriages 2-8 years ago. 

Just like after squatting they say, oh, we have been squatting for over a decade, this is our home now. 

NO, if the original act is illegal, the subsequent persistence of the illegal act does not make the original act legal. That original act, and all subsequent acts are illegal and need to be punished cumulatively. 

That original squatting, and all subsequent years, come under squatting only. Its not "home for 10 years". it is "Persistent and malicious Illegal occupation" for 10 years. 

I didn't pay attention to the news reports because that is what woke junta does. 

Why was Assam doing this? 

Assam's Infant and Mortality rates are among the worst in the country. 

31% of all marriages in Assam are UNDERAGE. Some children are less than 14 years of age at the time of marriage. This leads to high IMR and MMR. 

The National Family health Survey - 5, whose report was released in May 2022, clearly mentioned that underage marriages lead to high rates of IMR and MMR. (Infant and maternal mortality rates). 

A neighboring state, Arunachal, was much worse at the end of NFHS -3 - over a decade ago. From there to NFHS - 5, Arunachal is now one of the country's best states on IMR and MMR. Both Arunachal and Rajasthan have done massive work on child marriage prohibition and both states have been successful in improving their public health and fertility metrics. The children are healthier. Not just IMR, but mortality <5 years is also better. 

The Case 

Today, apparently, the Guwahati HC Bench of Justice Suman Shyam gave a ruling in which it mentioned: 

What is the POCSO here? Merely because POCSO is added, does it mean the judges will not see what is there?

"What do you want to get by custodial interrogation? Either he (accused men) has married or he has not, either it's a case of child marriage or its not.. for that is it necessary to have custodial interrogation?" asked the bench as six people submitted their bail application.

"If there is a marriage taking place in violation of statutory provisions, law will take its own course...but the punishment is two years and these are matters that have been taking place for a long time." said the court.

"This (crackdown on child marriage) is causing havoc in the lives of the people. There are children, there are family members, there are old people... This (child marriage) may not be a good idea, obviously this may be a bad idea, but we will give our views when the right time comes." said the judge.

My humble submission to the judges: 

Not my place to teach you the law, BUT:

A. Sexual Intercourse with a child less than 14 years of age is the textbook definition of Childhood Sexual Abuse - POCSO.

B. POCSO defines a child as a person less than 18 years of age. Ergo, ALL cases of child marriage come under POCSO, not just those of children under 14. (Therefore, non bailable) - you cannot give bails to people who are charged under POCSO using your own discretion. 

C. It has not "always been happening". Marrying a child and having sex with a child is not a passive action. It is DONE. It is a conscious act. The perpetrator knows that the child is underage. People giving their tacit acceptance to an illegal act should introspect whether they are the right people for chairs that require them to uphold the law.

Also, thank you for making me read the full POCSO Act.

And now for my honest opinion: 

What is weird is not these arrests and the application of POCSO. What is weird is that a judge wants to give his tacit approval to an illegal act. It is disturbing family lives, therefore we must not arrest criminals who married children? Wow! I am sooo impressed. 

A judge has to uphold the law. 

Everytime i decide to not lose my cool over things that don't directly concern me, the judiciary drops to a new low. Now will the CJI amend the constitution to allow underage marriages? He has already spoken about the need to reduce the marriageable age of girls.

Here is my view on that - 18 means that a girl can be legally married off before she completes her graduation (at the age of 20). A boy's marriageable age at 21 ensures that a child has had the chance to complete their education at least up to the undergraduate level. 

The age of 18 should be raised to 20, not lowered. So that girls who are forced to marry early at least can tell their parents (as many girls in Rajasthan have done) that they can call the police to the wedding. 

Also, I have been the girl who had a marriage rishta at the age of 15 and had someone come see her at the age of 19. I was then in Undergrad 2nd year. I had to fight to complete my undergrad degree. The boy's side wanted the marriage immediately and didnt think a girl should complete her degree. 

The law was not on my side. 

Later, I saw many girls use the law to convince their parents to let them complete their education. 

If parents feel that women's safety is an issue, the way to deal with that is to give self-defence training to the girls, and to stand up to every smart ass demeaning women - including the smartass who just made 1000 crores showing women as objects. 

If you watch a woman getting demeaned on screen, look the other side when someone is troubling a girl in the bus or train, and think that marrying off your girl early will protect her from rape by strangers - I have no words. 

#StopChildMarriage

On Judicial Reform in India

 So, this is disturbing me a lot.

Yesterday, I was forced to encounter 2 pieces of news. I slept over them because usually, that which boils the blood in the evening doesn't even heat the water by morning. But not this time. The 2 things were:

A. A democratically elected government passes an Act on Judicial Appointments that make these appointments non-collegium based. The judiciary single handedly scraps this law. There is no check and balance on this action.

B. This:

https://www.opindia.com/2022/12/sc-stays-death-sentence-of-m-samivel-who-raped-and-brutally-killed-a-minor-girl-in-tamil-nadu-in-2020/

The death sentence was given by not one but TWO subordinate courts under the same Supreme Court. The crime was heinous and proved.

The trouble is, these are not isolated data points. Before this, the SC undermined the death threat to Nupur Sharma and also publicly humiliated her in court, making completely unjustified remarks. Then, they jumped into the CEC appointment, forgetting that they are themselves under a very nepotistic, subject-to-flattery collegium system.

Here are some things that I am not able to get over:

A. The Constitution provides for a system of checks and balances for the Legislature and the Executive, but NONE for the judiciary.

B. In a Brut video of the Hon. President Smt. Draupadi Murmu, she asks, very rightly, "You ask us to make more jails to house more undertrials. But what we need is speedy dispensation of justice, not more undertrials. Why are they under trial after years?"

C. In as much as I could read, there is no performance criteria for a judge other than being favoured by the senior judges. Their record of speedy dispensation of justice, ensuring that people do not abuse the judicial process, even the quality of their judgements, amounts to nothing - because of the Collegium system. These contractors of meritocracy still appoint the CJI on the basis of one thing only - seniority!

And all I can think of, as citizens, do we not have a right to ask for Judicial Reform? Isn't that the right of every litigant, and every citizen of India? To correct an institution that is not, and has not, been working effectively, for many decades now?

What judicial reforms, if any, would you like, as a citizen of India? I really would like more inputs and insights.

Two lessons i learnt today

The trigger was someone posting that we are in the stage of reverse victimisation of men. Many men are punished because they are men. 

Then, someone wrote: The same is true of caste issues too. 

I wrote: There is a movement called One Family, One Reservation. This movement says that once a family has availaed of reservation, they should not be able to apply under the quota again. it should pass to another family. 

To which someone wrote: 

sure, we can do that once people stop getting killed for drinking water from the wrong well or growing a moustache. A one time reservation sadly doesn’t solve the entire caste issue.

Now, because caste has not been a factor in my growing up, I remain quiet on these caste related discussions. 

But this comment totally triggered me. 

So, here is the response that I did not put there: 

1. Hate is an end unto itself. Hate just follows the path of least privilege. It can be blacks, women, Dalit. It is a function of power. To consider that you have been singled out for hate is not right. 

2. If reservation has not solved the problem of casteism in 75 years, then it is definitely not the right solution. 

On boycotting a film

It is very easy to say that a boycott is hurting a movie. But Bollywood has given 3 hits in 2 years. Were all those films affected by trolls? Is any amount of introspection in order? As many people have said, trolls cannot keep a good film down. So, maybe, instead of blaming everyone else, people could pay attention to the quality of their work? Has even a single Bollywood person come out and said, "Audience have been rejecting us for 2 years. Maybe we should sit and think about what we are doing wrong in our story telling, our execution?"

Very easy to sit and blame the audience for "not appreciating how much hard work goes into making a film."

Salman Khan answered that beautifully once. His quote - "Director ne bola public ko picture samajh hi nahi aayi. Arre tumko public nahi samajh aayi."

The last movie I saw in theater was Samrat Prithviraj. The storytelling was very different from what I expected from that director. But when the film bombed, at least he said, "If you do not like my version of the story, discuss with me, tell me what your view is. I want to listen." Contrast that with "People don't understand the hard work." 

We are not supposed to understand your hard work and pay you for that. We are supposed to get entertained and pay you for that. Where is the confusion? 

There are 2 movies being released now. Only Aamir Khan has gone to town like a cry baby. Akshay Kumar (Rakshabandhan) has put his head down and let his work do the talking. This might be that actor's third flop within the last 6 months, but he has not become a drama king even once. His promotion of the films has been dignified, and focused on the work.

For Bollywood, the tide will turn once they start making good cinema. And, after we have given justice to Sushant Singh Rajput. And, PVR stops charging the rate of gold for pop corn. 

Until then, cry on! No one is coming to the theaters. 

Checks and Balances for the judiciary?

On May 24th, an 18-year-old man opened fire at an elementary school in Uvalde, Texas, USA, killing 19 students and two teachers. That is a primary school. Young children. 

This was not an isolated incident. In addition to supplying arms to the world, the US guns lobby also ensures that its citizens are able to use firearms freely, irrespective of the use to which they are put. Whether it is the Dick Cheney hunting accident, or the mass shooting, nothing has been able to convince US lawmakers to control the easy access to firearms and ammunition. 

But the Texas shooting was the straw that broke the camel's back. There was a national outcry and the citizens made it clear that status quo cannot continue. Something would have to change at the policy level. 

And it did. On June 23rd, the US Supreme Court ruled that teachers can henceforth carry guns. 

Then, on June 24th, the American Supreme Court overturned Row vs Wade. This basically means that in most states in the US,  a woman can no longer get an abortion. For Any Reason. 

Abortion is banned in Christianity, but the US is a secular state - legally. 

************* 

India: 

April: Rapist and Murderer of a 4 year old is a sinner with a future. 

On 23rd April, 2022, the Supreme Court overturned (reversed) a death sentence given to a man who had raped and murdered a 4 year old. Their words in the judgement: 

Supreme Court Bench of Justices UU Lalit, S Ravindra Bhatt, and Bela Trivedi mention - every saint has a past and every sinner has a future. 

On 20th May, a Supreme Court bench headed by Chief Justice N.V. Ramana and Justice Hima Kohli and including Justice L Nageswara Rao, decided on the Disha encounter case. What was the Disha encounter case? 

May: The Disha Encounter Case 

On Nov 27th, 2019, a 23 year old vet was returning home. On the way, her bike gave her trouble and she called her sister to inform her. She asked the sister to reach her soon because she was scared. When the sister reached, there was no trace of the doctor. 

The doctor had been raped, murdered, and then her body had been burnt. 

Her burnt body was subsequently recovered on November 28 morning from an underpass on National Highway 44. 

4 people were arrested by the police the very next day. By burning the body, the accused had basically obliterated all physical evidence like DNA, injury marks, post mortem, etc. 

Rape and murder arrests in India are abysmal and conviction rates are even lower. 

There was significant public anger after this crime. 

On Dec 6th, the 4 accused were encountered by the police. 

They were hailed as heroes by everyone, including the politicians of India. 

However, on 20th May, 2022, these 10 policemen were found guilty and the High Court was directed to take further action. That day, Indian Twitter trended with "We are with the police." 

July: The Nupur Sharma case 

An ASI (Archeological Survey of India) survey was going on to figure out if the Gyanvapi mosque was an erstwhile Hindu temple. A shivling had been found in the mosque complex. The Muslim community had then reached the Supreme Court and indicated that the structure was not a Shivlinga, but a fountain (in a place used to wash one's hands before offering namaaz). 

On a May 27 TV debate on the issue, Nupur Sharma, the spokesperson of the BJP, said to the representatives of Muslims that their religion is represented by the prophet marrying a 9 year old. 

Immediately, there was public uproar. The next day, she was suspended. 

The issue of the Gyanvapi mosque was immediately forgotten completely. 

After this, Nupur Sharma started getting death threats for her utterances. No one said that what she said was incorrect. But they objected to her saying it. "How dare she speak so disrespectfully?" 

On June 28th, a tailor named Kanhaiyalal, from Udaipur, who had received death threats because his son wrote a social media post supporting Nupur Sharma, was beheaded in public.

Nupur Sharma approached the Supreme Court to curb the FIRs being filed against her over remarks on Prophet Mohammed. She also mentioned that she has received threats. To which, on July 2nd,  a vacation bench of Justices Surya Kant and JB Pardiwala said - "She faces a security threat or has become a threat to the security of the nation?" 

Further: 

“This lady is single-handedly responsible for what is happening in the country,” commented Justice Surya Kant, who was extremely critical during the 20-minute hearing.

And these incidents make one think: 

What is the system of checks and balances for the judiciary?

Like, where can Indians and Americans go and say, "Wait a minute.. this needs a review.. ?" 

These judgements make me ask a fundamental question - the system of checks and balances exists for every pillar of government, except one. 

Where is the check and balance for this branch of governance? Appointment of judges is done by the judiciary, the recommendation goes from the judiciary, the appeal against the decision of the lower court is to the higher court. And if such a system of checks and balances is not there, maybe its time to create it?

Impeachment of Judges in India 

While there is no procedural control over the judiciary, individual judges can be impeached. 
But the process is the same as the Amendment of the Constitution by a Special Majority of the Parliament, AND an enquiry committee before that parliament session can be convened. In short, it requires a quorum of 100 in the Lok Sabha and 50 in the Rajya Sabha. It must be ratified by 2/3rd of the members present and at least 50% of the total members of BOTH houses. 

Impeachment of Judges - Law Insider India

This means that, effectively, a political party must have 2/3rd majority in BOTH Houses of the Parliament to proceed with impeachment. 

Therefore, no. of judges that have been impeached in India: 0. 

************** 

Can the Supreme Court really trivialise the death threats to a person days after another person was brutally beheaded in the country? 

Can the Supreme Court really decide that she was single-handedly responsible for the violence, when the weapons had been lifted by someone else? Which weapon did she lift? Whom did she threaten? Is it ok to threaten someone on the basis of what they said? Or, Does the Court believe that Freedom of Speech is selectively applied?  

Her lawyer said - She responded to provocation.

If there is a misuse of the debate, the first thing she should have done was to file an FIR against the anchor", the bench commented.

However, the same Bench does not think that the people committing violence and setting the country on fire should have filed FIRs.

They can burn the country and Nupur Sharma is 'single-handedly' responsible for that.


So, in one case, the instigator is blameless, and in the other, the alleged instigator is single handedly responsible.

(I use the term alleged in the loosest possible manner. No one is saying what Nupur said was incorrect. Only that it hurt their sentiments. Even the Bench says - 

"We saw the debate on how she was incited. But the way she said all this and later says she was a lawyer it is shameful. She should apologise to the whole country," 

Ahem.. this is how I see these utterances. And, I am reminded of the classic Hillary Clinton quote - would you ask a man that question? 

Sigh!

In a world run by majoritarianism, where do people like us go? The ones who don't like what most people like? The ones who like the weird and the abnormal? Where do we go? The Youtube videos we like are hidden anywhere from 80th to 120th place. The page we are looking for doesn't pop up on Google search (Thank God for Duckduckgo), the images we want to use don't pop up on image search.. where do we, the abnormals, go?