Saturday, December 25, 2021

Funny Hindi poem on posting everything on Social Media

 Someone asked on Linkedin: Neki Kar Dariya mein daal, or Neki kar social par daal ? 

(Should you post your good deeds on social media?)

AND my head had to respond with a funny Hindi poem. Its a parody on a classic Hindi film song about the importance of humility and doing good deeds.

सजन रे post मत डालो 

खुदा के पास जाना है 

न FB है, न  Insta है,

वहाँ offline ही जाना है। 


तुम्हारे followers न्यारे 

यहीं रह जाएंगे सारे 

अकड़ किस बात की प्यारे 

ये सर फिर भी झुकाना है 


भला कीजे भला होगा, 

बुरा कीजे बुरा होगा 

Post लिख लिख के क्या होगा 

Account Memorial बनाना है 


लड़कपन Discord खोया

जवानी LI पर सोया 

बुढ़ापा देख कर रोया 

वही किस्सा पुराना है 

 This is the original song on which the parody rests: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IR9ShQEdcgg


The Roman transcript: 

Sajan re post mat daalo,
khuda ke pas jaana hai,
na Fb hai na insta hai,
vahaan offline hi jaana hai.
Tumhaare followers nyaare,
yahin reh jayenge saare,
Akad kis bat ki pyaare
Ye sar phir bhi jhukana Hai
Bhala keeje bhala hoga,
Bura keeje bura hoga
Post likh likh ke kya hoga
Account Memorial banana hai
Ladakpan Discord khoya,
Jawani LI par soya
Budhaapa Dekh kar roya
Vahi kissa purana hai


Friday, December 24, 2021

Book Review: Two and a half rivers by Anirudh Kala



Usually, when one does not like a book, one keeps quiet. If very angry with the book for wasting time on it, one tends to give it a low rating on Amazon and maybe write a short negative review. 
But this book was bought from a curated book store and then read with dedication. 
Its a 3 hour read at a pithy 234 pages. 

The book has 4 sub plots - the terrorism in Punjab, The status of Dalits in Punjab, the business of Deras in Punjab, and clinical depression in medical professionals (the narrator). No wait, there is also that subplot about Shiv Sena and Maharasthra, the missionary activity in Punjab, and so on.. 

Perhaps the author thought that it would be very interesting to present the narrative through the eyes of the clinically depressed doctor who lives in the wilderness, while also subtly covering the doctor's own struggle with depression and while we are at it, lets also cover covert conversion by missionaries in the name of education, and lets throw in a little tirade on the tough life of the shrink during violent times.

As a reader, I simply don't have the kind of range that the author brings to the table. I like stories with focused characters, exploring those characters as fully as possible, especially if it is going to be a story about historically significant events and if those historically significant events are going to be interpreted, not merely referenced and documented. 

I could probably have lived with 2 parallel plots - the story of the 2 Dalit kids who have grown up together and what they have had to go through, and the story of how terrorism affected them. But the novel narrates terrorism through the eyes of the doctor, indicating only some key actions that are taken by Bheem and Shamsie because the political climate. 

What emerges for the reader is a mixed veg sabzi in which half boiled potatoes are thrown with overcooked mushrooms, barely cooked carrots, hastily mashed tomatoes, in a thick gravy of undercooked onions. 

And therefore, you are left with that feeling of not being able to immerse in anything completely. We cannot even fully understand Shamsie and Bheem - both intelligent and complex characters, because they do these guest appearences across chapters. Why? 
Why is Sidhu's character not explored more - he fits so well into the story and deserves to get more print space. There are so many unanswered questions about him - Jassi and Bheem can't be the only good singers in Punjab - why did he tag along with just these 2? What kind of band survives without a lead singer? Esp in the Punjab of the 1980s, where a singer and a comedian were core to the performance industry? How did he manage to subdue his love for Jassi? 

Just as you start to get into the world of Shamsee and Bheem, along comes doctor sahib with his depression and the weird things that are happening around him - the dead bodies floating on the river, the kidnapping by both sides, and so on. And as you are trying to understand this barely believable character, Poof! Like a magician, Enter Dr. Mustafa and his story. 

Oh wait, we also have to talk about dera owners and partition violence and regimentation at the dera.. why leave anything out? 

But perhaps the most irritating feature of the book is its series of competely one sided inferences about what was going on in Punjab, or the hardly fictionalised academic sounding but basically one sided view of the terror issue in Punjab.

The final violence in the book is both unnecessary and repugnant. It contributes nothing to the climax of the plot, and is perhaps the most irrelevant, useless climax events I have ever read in a book. 

This book should have gone into the furnace of a sharp editor and been reworked a fair bit before being released. 

Perhaps the author targeted breadth, perhaps the author wanted to share a one sided view of history, in which it is mentioned that 8000 men will not return home because of police brutality, but does not mention the number of people who lost their young boys, earning men, and livelihoods to the Boys, as he calls them. None of those approaches worked for me, as a reader. 

He tries to bring out the negatives in the work of the Boys, but through the soft padding of anecdotes, unlike the hard numbers that he uses to showcase the police side. He also completely forgets to mention the sleepless nights that police personnel had to spend in this business of vigils and verifications. Unexpected deaths were all over. Policemen, too, left home after waving Bye to their school going children, and never came back again. 

I would give this book a miss, and a wide berth. A book that evidently is a fruit of labour, but kind of lacks both taste and flavour. 





 





Wednesday, December 22, 2021

Is physical the only dimension of being - Meditation Chat

This came to me in the temple at Sikkim, and i was asked to write this down. 

For a few weeks now, I have wondered: 

A. Is length, breadth, depth the only way to measure dimensions of existence? What if physical was only one of the dimensions of existence, and when we zoom out, we see how our existence really looks in a larger field? "Our" means everything and everyone. 

B. Many ppl today tend to believe that the spiritual process and spiritual growth is superlative to, or more important than the accumulation of wealth and material benefits. A lot of people, of course, believe the exact opposite. Is there really a hierarchy to achievement? Is one kind of achievement more important than the other? Does one kind take us closer to Nirvana? 

And here is the answer that came at the temple. 

1. There are at least 3 dimensions of existence, and they are not l,b,h. They are the physical plane, the intellectual (चेतन) , and the spiritual. We call them in Hindi - शारीरिक, बौद्धिक/ चैतन्य, आध्यात्मिक। 

2. No dimension is more or less important than any other. They come together to form the entity at all times. Spiritual  attainment will not take you close to Nirvana until you have experienced all that your senses are meant to experience and have understood through reasoning all that you need to work out and understand through your Chetana. Even Buddha needed to do penance before understanding that starvation is not the route to salvation. His Chetana needed to do that experiment and arrive at that conclusion. 

3. There are no non living things. Chetna and Bodh exist in all things, even if they appear non living to our current level of knowledge. 

4. We understand in the spirit dimension, we know in the chetan dimension, and we experience it in the physical dimension. For example, think of the concept of tripti (satisfaction). You feel thirsty and drink water. Nothing in the intellectual or spiritual domain can help you understand tripti like the simple act of being thirsty and drinking water. 

5. Our journeys are not linear, and they were never meant to be. As our body grows in all dimensions, so does our existence. Our journeys include the journeys of our loved ones and other entities that we interact with. We leave an imprint on them and they leave one on us. Think of it as a radial map. You are growing or shrinking in all dimensions at the same time. And sometimes, we just are. That is fine too. There is no growth imperative anywhere. 

6. A lot of shoulds melt. When you zoom out, you realise that "is" is the only verb that matters. The shoulds, coulds, woulds, would haves, they really mean nothing. They never did. Try to bind yourself to the shoulds that matter to you. Shoulds should be guiding lamps, not handcuffs. 



Tuesday, December 21, 2021

Children's poetry on expecting marks of exams

 दे दी मैंने परीक्षा 

अब फल आने वाले हैं 

सब गीता के उपदेश 

काम आने वाले हैं। 


कर्म कर दिया, फल न देखो 

फल पर कोई बस नहीं है 

आत्मा अमर है 

नंबर क्षणिक हैं 


कोटा फैक्ट्री की माफिक 

पार्टी तो होगी

या माहेश्वरी, या संजु भैया 

केवल पार्टी सत्य है 

सीट, नंबर, सब फ़ानी है। 

दुनिया आनी - जानी है... 

*In an Indian web series called Kota Factory, all the successful students (who get a seat in IIT) get a party at Maheshwari classes. All the unsuccessful students are invited to the house of a mentor and teacher - Sanju bhaiya, to party. 





Funny children's poetry for exams

कोई मुझको ये बतलाये 

परीक्षा का है क्या उपाय?


हर बच्चे को सताती है 

जीवन सूना कर जाती है! 


खाना, खेलना सब हराम 

केवल पढ़ते रहो जनाब! 


अंग्रेज़ी, हिन्दी, और भूगोल 

मेरे तो सब ही हैं गोल! 


विज्ञान से न है मेरा नाता 

न ही मुझको गणित है भाता 


दस सवाल पूछ के टीचर 

खुद को देव समझते हैं 

भूतों जैसी व्यवस्था है 

जिस में सारे रटते हैं! 


पर मैं भी हूँ सूपर स्मार्ट 

परीक्षा करना है इक आर्ट 


परीक्षा अग्नि सरीखी है 

ये बात माँ से सीखी है। 


जो आग घर जलाती है 

वह माँ का खाना पकाती है। 


जिस का तुम कर सकते वहन 

वह कैसे करे तुम्हारा दहन? 


थोड़ा पढ़ो, थोड़ा पढ़ाओ, 

मिल कर यह संकट निबटाओ। 


कुछ दिन की तो बात है प्यारे 

ग्रहण भी कुछ पल रहते सारे। 


दुनिया आनी- जानी है 

यह परीक्षा भी फ़ानी है। 












Monday, December 20, 2021

Dedicated to all my friends who write political poetry

हम कविता वाले लोग हैं, 

हम छंदों में बतियाते हैं 

मज़दूर का साथ निभाने को 

शब्दों के कुदाल उठाते हैं 

कंधे से कंधा मिल कर हम 

उसका भार उठाते हैं। 


भूखों से हमें विशेष लगाव 

शब्दों के कौर खिलाते हैं 

उनके नाम की कविता लिख कर 

पेट अपने भर पाते हैं 

हम कविता वाले लोग हैं 

हम छंदों में बतियाते हैं 


दायित्व कोई नहीं हमारा 

केवल अधिकार हमारे हैं

व्यंग्य हमारा साधन है,

बस खुद पर न सह पाते हैं 

हम  कविता वाले लोग हैं, 

हम छंदों में बतियाते हैं 


We are the people of poetry 

We speak in rhyme scheme

We pick our words to help him 

The mason on the street

We stand with him, shoulder to shoulder. 

And use our words to clean. 


We love the destitute the most 

We feed them our  verse 

And feed off their poverty, 

No one is any the worse. 


No responsibility, no sirree, 

Only rights we claim 

Satire is our specialty

But we are not fair game. 







Saturday, December 18, 2021

Book Review: Bodies from the Library 3

 If, like me, you love mystery and detective fiction, and have finished all mainstream authors, this book, and the entire series, is for you. 

The stories range from the innocent to the macabre, but the plots are all intelligent and the writing all superb. 

The book also has a rare find - the only known detective fiction story by William Collins, the scion of  Collins Publications. 

The Orange Plot mysteries are interesting - a single line of plot is shared, and 6 authors interpret it in their own way. My favourites in this series were He Stooped to Live and The Orange Kid. 

There are two long stories in the book. I liked Grand Guignol. A knotty problem was written in the form of a play and is best enjoyed like that. Too many characters for a 40 page story. 

Among the short stories, Hot Steel, The House of the Poplars, The Case of the Unlucky Airman, and The Riddle of the Black Spade are all interesting and stand out. To be fair, I have left the Poirot story out of comparison. It stands out in its brilliance. 

At 370 pages, this book is ideal for a couple of languid afternoons, or perhaps 2 flight journeys. 







Thursday, December 02, 2021

Chits

Master,  there are so many problems.  No one to trust.  No one to work with.  No one to even talk to.  Things are getting harder day by day. 

I'll tell you the solution.  But you won't do it. 

Is it very hard,  master?

It's very simple. 

Is it very expensive then?

Doesn't cost a penny. 

Very time consuming?

On the contrary,  it'll save you time. 

Then why will i not follow it master? Please tell me. 

Think hard, child. Its just 2 things. But you won't be able to do them. 

I will master.  Please tell them to me.

Ok. I'm writing them on this chit here.  See them when you're sure. 

On opening:
1. Trust and let go.
2. Love. Always.  Just. Love. 

But this is so simple. 

But child,  do you know when to use which chit?

Both together master.  Always.  Both. together.  

 I think, one of the blessings of this blog is that when the world disappoints you, yet again, you come here and read the old posts. One of them will tell you what you are feeling, and unable to say. 


Wednesday, December 01, 2021

More original one liners

 शादी की 25 वीं सागीरह पर लोगों को Grand Party नहीं, बहादुरी का पुरुस्कार मिलना चाहिए। 


Vendetta is not vindication. 


Wednesday, November 24, 2021

Funny Hindi poem on exercise

 एक दिन हुआ ये संयोग

सीखने चले हम भी योग

 

पहले प्राणायाम कराया

फिर टीचर ने गले लगाया

इतनी गहरी होगी सांस

हमको कब था ये आभास?

 

पद्मासन ने छक्के छुड़ाए

टांगें कोई कैसे सधाये ?!

पैर करें न वार्तालाप

हम ही करते चले विलाप!  

आ- आ – आ के साथ

पद्मासन न छोड़े जान

 

“चलो तुम्हें कुछ सरल सिखाएँ”

गुरु ने ये तेवर अपनाए

सूर्य नमस्कार करें आरंभ

सरल हो योग से संबंध

किन्तु सूर्य नभ-पथिक हैं

उनका  नमन बहुत कठिन है!

 

गुरु अब हौले से मुस्काए

अपना ब्रह्मास्त्र ले आए

“आपके लिए है एक ही आसन”

कह कर सिखाया शवासन!

हम भी हो गए तुरंत प्रसन्न!

गुरु को किया कोटि नमन!

Friday, November 19, 2021

On the repeal of farm laws

 Woke up to the news of repeal of farm laws. Either Punjab has made its second big mistake today, or Amrinder Singh has just secured the kingdom of Punjab.

Punjab's first big mistake was not making drugs a political issue. Both political parties in Punjab were making money from drugs and transport. That explains the suboptimal rail network in Punjab. 

Last year's govt procurement in Punjab sent a clear signal - Record procurement was done from the non-protesting regions of Punjab and minimal procurement from the protesting regions. 

Someone then told me that maybe this is part of a secret pact with Amrinder. That changes things completely. Because with this masterstroke, the Maharaja of Patiala (Amrinder Singh is the descendant of the Maharaja of Patiala and also would have been the holder of that title if the titles had not been legally abolished) has secured the kingdom of Punjab forever. 


Wednesday, November 17, 2021

More One Liners

 उसकी नाक उसकी अक्ल से ज़्यादा बड़ी थी। 

 

Ignorance, Embellished with arrogance, usually calls itself wisdom or experience.  In the worst case scenario, both.

Friday, November 12, 2021

Bal Divas par Hasya Kavita

 कैसे-कैसे हैं क्या बताऊँ

मेरे गाँव के बालक

एक से एक नमूने सारे

भगवान हैं इनके पालक।

 

भोलू नाम से, काम से चालू

टिफ़िन छीने जैसे भालू

 

मोहन सबसे लड़ता है

किसी के मन नहीं बसता है

 

विद्या को न भाये किताब

कनकव्वे उड़ाएँ जनाब

 

विनोद नाम का लिया है ठेका

इसे कभी हँसता न देखा

 

रोशनी इतना सताती है

जीवन अंधियारा कर जाती है

 

सुभाषिणी के मुंह से निकलता

साक्षात भूराल (लावा)

सुशील के मुंह से निकले गाली

बिना किसी अंतराल

 

सबसे प्यारा नाम है धर्म

चोरी-झूठ हैं इनके कर्म

 

जो बच्चे मन के सच्चे हैं

वो मेरे गाँव न बसते हैं

 

जो बच्चे अक्ल के कच्चे हैं

वो कान कतरने में अच्छे हैं. 

 

 

Wednesday, November 10, 2021

Udaipur Travelogue

We were in Udaipur for a whirlwind 3D/2N holiday, which is hardly enough to explore the city. 

But, we learnt some valuable lessons on this journey, and that deserves to be documented. 

First, when we usually stay at a heritage property, it is so far removed from the main city that the sounds of the city never reach us. This time, thanks to last minute booking, we got a property that was pat in old Udaipur city. The arti from the nearby temple, the last day of Navratri celebration, everything reached our ears. It was so lovely to be out at midnight, just walking the tiny lanes of old Udaipur. 

The auto drivers we met were both very nice. The taxi drivers were the exact opposite. Because of the weather, it was great fun to get into an auto and just go all over town. We would love to do that again some day. Deepak, our Man Friday, went out of our way to be available whenever we called him, and did a lot to ensure we got everything we wanted. 

The taxi owners (they were self driving their cars) - Bablu and Raju, were both uniformly pathetic. They: 

A. Overcharged us

B. Did not understand what the guest would like. Routinely, they took us to places we did not like and completely missed places we would not have discovered if it wasn't for Google baba. Please avoid at least these 2 taxi drivers if you can. 

C. Specifically misguided us. Instead of saying "I do not want to go there" they said, "That is a complete walk way. Vehicles are not allowed there any more." I remembered that the City Palace gate is different. They took us to a gate from where we spent 100 rs per head extra on the golf cart, it took longer, and we had to buy an extra ticket for no reason. Another time, they took us to the Vintage car museum, we bought expensive tickets though we did not want to see the cars, and found that their recommendation of what we would find at that place was completely incorrect. Another time, I specifically checked with them if the amenities at Kumbhalgarh are clean, otherwise we can stop at a place before reaching. "Don't worry, everything is available. All amenities clean and accessible." Zilch. Zero. nada. We walked out of Kumbhalgarh within minutes of reaching. When you have been in a car for more than 1.5 hours, you do NOT want unclean amenities soon as you reach. 

D. Do not go to any expensive showrooms. Do NOT buy Semal ki rui ki rajai. It is a rip off. We bought it at twice the price of a regular Kapaas (cotton) ki rui ki rajai and it is in tatters within 15 days of being at home. Do NOT buy marble artifacts from showrooms. No one told us where we could get something for ourselves. 

E. When you search for properties on the internet, the Lalit does not come up at all. But The Lalit has a LOVELY property in Udaipur, near the Fateh Sagar lake. Isolated and beautiful. 

Things to do in Udaipur 

If, like us, you dig heritage properties and history, Kumbhalgarh and Haldi Ghati will be nice. Don't go to the private museum. Go straight to Haldi Ghati. After that, go further ahead, and you will find distilleries that make ark and gulab jal etc. We bought from there and it has been v nice. The Chaitri Gulab fragrance in particular is very lasting. 

Within Udaipur, the City Palace is the draw for the right reasons. Absolutely amazing. Do keep at least 2-3 hours for this one. Do invest in a guide. Do NOT respond to sexist jokes by the guide, esp about why is the lion smiling. 

We could not experience boating or the ropeway because the lakes were being cleaned after the festival, and because the ropeway was far too crowded for our liking. But if that's your thing, please do try them out. 

DO pluck the custard apples etc. on the way to Haldi Ghati. Do engage with the local children. Do see the local water harvesting wheels that you will encounter if you look closely. 

We also recommend the thalis very highly, esp if you love the thali system of eating. Natraj it was for us. 




Ceiling of the Udaipur City Palace courtyard

Pencil sketch of a section of the hotel

Our ceiling

Hotel

View from the room 

We also spent an entire evening just walking the tiny lanes of Udaipur old city and it was nice. We were there on the last day of Navratri, so there was all night praying and celebration. The lake was walking distance but we were too tired to walk by the lakeside, though have been told that that is good too. 

Our hotel was, as mentioned earlier, a proper old haveli, pat in the middle of the old city, and had a good view of the lake and the city palace. It was quiet, not crowded, and that suited us very well. 

THE Haldi Ghati



Our staircase at the hotel





दिवाली

सुनो, इस बार यूं करो 

ये 'मन का दीपक' रहने दो 

'अंदर का रावण' रहने दो 

सब ज्ञान की बातें रहने दो 


लड्डू खाओ, पेड़े खाओ, 

वो हेल्थी - वेलदी रहने दो 

बाज़ार जाओ, समान लाओ, 

ये ऑनलाइन - वॉनलाइन रहने दो 

 

पैर छुओ, गले मिलो, 

ये व्हाट्सप्प मैसेज रहने दो। 

खूब सजें, मन भर के हंसें,

अब ऐसी दिवाली करने दो। 


Thursday, November 04, 2021

हिन्दी बाल कविता दिवाली पर Hindi Poem on Diwali

 दीप ले कर आई दिवाली 

सबके मन को भायी दिवाली 

धनतेरस, गोवर्धन पूजा 

भाई दूज भी लायी दिवाली 


अनार, फूलझड़ी, और लड़ियाँ 

देखो जुड़तीं हंसी की कड़ियाँ 

बादाम, पतीसा, रसमलाई 

क्या-क्या अच्छा लायी दिवाली! 


मौसा मौसी मिलने आए 

हमारे लिये खिलौने लाए 

हम भी सब से मिलनें जाएँ 

चलो भई, आ गई दिवाली! 




Wednesday, November 03, 2021

The Case of altered LinkedIn algorithm

Once upon a time, a person called Reid Hoffman co-founded a website that would allow professionals to share their knowledge and experience with each other. Unlike industry specific websites, this one was for all professionals to connect with each other. 

The platform turned profitable within 3 years of launch and has, since inception, remained the world's no. 1 professional platform. 

In 2016, it was acquired by Microsoft at a valuation of 26.2 billion dollars. The leadership remained the same. 

Some changes were made to the UI then. These changes were criticised in the short term but the overall usage of the platform did not suffer. 

In 2019, Linkedin decided to change its algorithm. The key driver of the change was "engagement" - that elusive Utopia of networks. 

In its blog post,  Linkedin spoke about the technicals, but this article helps break it down, to some degree.

What we can understand is that underrepresented content creators will be given some algo space on the feed so their reach can grow, and community engagement will be one of the key drivers of what succeeds, and what does not. In short, the algo will learn what works and what does not. 

The intention, perhaps..

was to create a situation in which exceptional content created by any content creator, would be highlighted. In time, the best content would get traction normally, and the algo would learn what works and what does not. 

The program worked perfectly, but... 

So, what happened was exactly what was intended - content creators were given feed space. The best performing feeds were picked up by the algo and similar feeds were amplified in the future. 

The result of which was that images of Gods, personal stories of pathos, achievements of children, random polls, political jokes, and other assorted paraphernalia increased. In 2021, it is hard to tell whether one is scrolling Facebook or Linked in. 

The algo learnt perfectly. The humans behaved ... well, not as intended. 

The success of the algo was based on the assumption that users would only engage with professional content on a professional platform. That didn't happen. 

So, dear readers, please do not blame Linkedin for the perceived deterioration of your LI feed. This is what other humans want to see and read.  

Users who still value only professional content on LI, are called LI purists (and that is not a positive term). 

Friday, October 29, 2021

1984 by George Orwell

 Does anyone know why 1984 was written for one corner of the world and came true in the exact opposite corner? In the exact space that was meant to be the opposite of 1984?

I am truly interested in thoughts.

https://www.msn.com/en-in/money/technology/a-departing-facebook-employee-said-omniscient-robots-owned-by-mark-zuckerberg-won-t-save-the-company-from-its-moderation-problems/ar-AAQ3YDX?ocid=msedgntp

Book Review: Maharani by Diwan Jarmani Das

I have long campaigned that if we have to save the planet, we should not tax consumption. We should tax the waste generated. Every household should be taxed according to the waste it generates and the progeny it creates. 

If the trash tax was a reality, it would apply to this book. The publisher would have been taxed on every copy going off the press. 

According to Diwan Jarmani Das, it is customary for the Maharajas to have mistresses and concubines, but for their own safety, the Maharanis must be kept in the 3 layer security in the palace and any transgression should be suitably dealt with. 

Not content with convincing us that the Maharanis had only one side to their personality - the erotic, he also goes on to generously disburse his opinion on why working women and educated women are a disaster. The woman comes home tired and is not able to look after the welfare of the family. This leads to a situation where the husband returns tired from work and finds that there is no one to look after him and his needs. This is the main reason why men go astray. 

So generously is this advice doled out, in fact, that the book reads like a sermon book rather than a record of the maharanis. Not content with giving advice to mere mortal beings, the author also decides to give advice on the Khajuraho temples. (Read excerpts below) 

And the book is not about Indian maharanis. It also tells us the details of the sexcapades and the bitter retribution given to European queens. That section, of course, is a waste of time because the book was bought to read about the lives of, well, Maharanis. 

Here are a few excerpts from this book. They are self-explanatory. 

In my opinion, women's main job is to look after husbands and children and the formation of their character. 


The homes which were like paradise before the so called emancipation of women have become, in most cases, a blazing till due to the disparity in thought and culture between husband and wife, between father and daughter. 


Most of these perverted maharanis were the offspring of the ultra modern education with they received under British tutors in India and at schools and colleges in England. 


The husband and wife do not have enough time have intimate talks with each other on family matters and to spend a few hours of bliss which is the duty of the wife to provide for the husband who comes home tired after a hard day's work. 


Women in the services, and particularly in high posts, dominate their husbands, with the results that mutual love or confidence between them is gone. In the upper classes, wives are becoming nagging monsters and behave like superior beings. 


They wear chiffon and high coiffeurs, and their mouths are reddened with lipstick and the eyebrows blackened, the back lines above the eyebrows giving them the look of a professional prostitute. 

But the majority of women do not believe in feminism, they care for more for femininity. 

French women, even though they are in service or politics, are seductive and sexy. They take care of their figure and complexion unlike the suffragete women of England and the USA who, when in politics or high office, look more manly and neglect their dresses. 


Women want to create a lovable impression on their husbands and get things done without having legal rights. 


In France, before the Matrimonial Bill of 1964 which abrogated the old laws that forbade women from opening bank accounts or obtaining passports, the wife's infidelity was considered more serious than her husband's desertion and infidelity.


And finally, advice for our temples: 

Khajuraho and similar temples in Orissa and other states depicting sexual poses are a gross insult to Indian culture and civilisation. 


We should either demolish these temples or forbid foreigners to visit them. 

Whatever explanation one may be able to give the visitors about the true interpretation of these sexual poses, they begin to believe that Hindu religion and temples are all dedicated to sex worship. 


Endnote: 

1. Women should not buy this book because (read excerpts above) and chauvinistic men who agree with the author should not buy this book because the book will kill their domestic monopoly on misogynistic advice. At least within their house , they deserve to remain the specialists on the subject of what women should and should not do. 


2. This book, if it remains in publication, should be heavily edited to completely remove the personal insights of the author, remove the European history and sexual laxity, and just share the facts of the lives of the maharanis. 


Monday, October 25, 2021

More Venting

Please tell me that you have a running season of "Teenage Tantrum, Mad Mom" in your houses too?

Wednesday, October 20, 2021

One more sexist joke, and my repartee

 पत्नी औ घड़ी के बीच का संबंध :....

 - समानताएं :

1. घड़ी चौबीस घंटे टिक-टिक करती रहती है !! और पत्नी चौबीस घंटे किट-किट करती रहती है !!

 2. घड़ी की सूइयाँ घूम-फिर कर वहीं आ जाती हैं !! उसी प्रकार पत्नी को आप कितना भी समझा लो, वो घूम-

फिर कर वहीं आ जायेगी और अपनी ही बात मनवायेगी !!

 3. घड़ी बिगड़ जाये तो मैकेनिक के यहाँ जाती है !! पत्नी बिगड़ जाये तो मैके जाती है !!

 4. घड़ी को चार्ज करने के लिये सेल (बैटरी) का प्रयोग होता है !! और पत्नी को चार्ज करने के लिये सैलेरी का प्रयोग होता है !!

 

- विषमतायें :

1. घड़ी में जब १२ बजते हैं तो तीनों सूइयाँ एक दिखाई देती हैं !! लेकिन पत्नी के जब १२ बजतेे

  तो एक पत्नी भी ३-३ दिखाई देती है !!

 2. घड़ी के अलार्म बजने का फिक्स टाइम है !! लेकिन पत्नी के अलार्म बजने का कोई फिक्स टाइम नहीं है !

 3.घड़ी बिगड़ जाये तो रूक जाती है !! लेकिन जब पत्नी बिगड़ जाये तो शुरू हो जाती है !!

4. सबसे बड़ा अंतर ये कि घड़ी को जब आपका दिल चाहे बदल सकते हैं !! मगर पत्नी को चाह कर भी बदल नहीं सकत

 

My Response: 

पति और गधे के बीच समानताएँ और विषमताएँ

  1. गधा समय समय पर धैचू- धैचू की पुकार लगता है और पति समय समय पर चाय चाय की।
  2. गधे से आप वज़न उठाने के अलावा कोई काम नहीं करवा सकते। वो भी तब जब उसकी इच्छा हो। पति का भी ऐसा ही है।
  3. गधे की टांगों को बांध कर न रखा जाए तो वे कहीं भी भाग निकलता है। पति का भी ऐसा ही है।
  4. गधे किसी के सगे नहीं होते। सालों उन्हें कोई खिलाए पिलाए, उनका ध्यान रखे, पहला मौका मिलते ही नकेल तोड़ कर भाग जाते हैं।
  5. गधा घास चरता है, और पति दिमाग।
  6. गधा दुलत्ती मारते हुए बिल्कुल नहीं सोचता कि चोट किसे लगेगी, कितनी गहरी लगेगी। पति भी मुंह खोलते हुए ऐसा कुछ नहीं सोचते।
  7. सारी दुनिया को पता है कि गधा अव्वल दर्जे का आलसी, बेवकूफ, नीरस, और बेसुरा प्राणी है। किन्तु गधे को इस प्रकार का कोई आत्माभास नहीं है। अपनी नजर में वह सचमुच दुनिया का सबसे सुंदर, सर्वश्रेष्ठ प्राणी है।
  8. गधे की नजर सदा नीची रहती है। उसके इरादों पर भी यही विशेषण लागू होता है। पति भी पत्नी के सामने भीगी बिल्ली बनने का अभिनय करते हैं, और उनके इरादे भी अपने समतुल्य प्राणी जितने ही नीच होते हैं।   

 

विषमताएँ

  1. इन दोनों प्राणियों में कोई विषमता नहीं पाई जाती। विधाता ने इन्हें एक ही साँचे में ढाल कर बनाया है।
But this is so painful, that people think it is ok to post stuff that is this insensitive and cruel. I hated writing this repartee. Its cruel and insensitive. But telling people to lay off sexist jokes makes one appear as a party pooper. Giving them a taste of their own medicine will hopefully help them understand exactly what they are bringing to the table. I have now asked the group to post fewer sexist jokes. If this person does not stop, i will have to write more obnoxious stuff. Gives me something to vent, for sure. But not the thoughts i want to have. 
This is, however, the best way to get rid of the anger that such petty content creates. 

Tuesday, October 19, 2021

Why does the development sector lie so much?

I have now been engaged with the development sector for more than 25 years. 

Yesterday, we found another overstated work that could not be verified. 

While complaining to a mentor, I said, 70% of the work in development sector is hogwash. 

He agreed. We both knew. 

But after the angst was over, i sat down to wonder why that is so. These millions of people who make it their life's work to change the lives of others -why do they overstate their impact? Why do they project that which we know, through experience, is not going to happen? 

Malafide motivation cannot be the answer, because development sector jobs don't pay that much. Even for large NGOs, getting honest grants on an ongoing basis is a real challenge. 

There is no easy answer. 

But the top 2-3 things that jump up are: 

A. The structure of the industry 

Everyone knows that human change is a slow and laborious job. Yet, funding agencies need to see numbers and impact within a finite time. If you want your mother to give up a habit (that is one person and one behaviour change), you do not know how long it will take. Yet, funding agencies want NGos to wave a magic wand and tell them that they will get 100x people to change 10x habits / beliefs / attitudes within  the next 2-3 years. 

B. The incorrect inherent assumption 

This is actually my realisation after 25 years in the sector. When we did गरीबी हटाओ, we assumed that that was an objective for everyone. That everyone wants to improve their lot by working hard and /or studying. If we just create the opportunities, those opportunities will be taken. 

Turns out, that is not true. People want to get rich, but not by working hard or studying hard. They want to get rich by getting doles that they can then sell at a profit and go back to being poor and underprivileged to get more doles. That is their personal revenue model. That is their chosen profession. 

Low income housing, MNREGA, PDS, and a host of other welfare measures, both state and private, have taught us that a small fraction of the population will indeed choose hard work or education as a means of upliftment. But that assumption cannot be applied to the entire population. 

Yet, 75 years and counting, neither the planners nor the funding agencies, nor the NGOs themselves, have started to factor in "beneficiary receptiveness" in their model. 

We created an employment model. The idea allowed a person to become financially self reliant. Out of over 100 people we presented the idea to, only TWO people wanted to try it out as a profession. 

In our other projects too, we have had a proportion of people who want to try it before not taking it up, and a much smaller population that then goes on to benefit from the opportunity. 

At first, we thought this was a case of poorly designed solutions. That if we created better solutions that actually do meet the need, that solution would be adopted by pull model and we won't have to push it. 

2 years and 2 research projects later, we learnt that we were wrong. It was not a case of a poorly designed solution. It was a case of poorly understood problem. We assumed that knowledge was an inherent need. It is not. People do not know because they do not want to know. This was a huge shock to us. 

But think of it from their perspective, and it makes perfect sense. 

We tend to think of life in terms of a single currency - money. Therefore, the more money we have, the better our lives will be. 

But they know instinctively that that is not true. Time, leisure, relationships, are all currencies. When we lift ourselves to a better financial position, we lose the social ties with our peer group. With our relatives. We have to fit into a new social circle which may or may not be as welcoming. When we devote time to hard work,  leisure is sacrificed. When we spend time in studying, we cannot use that time to earn, to help, to meet friends, to do other things that lead to more instant gratification. 

So, I end this day, not with complaint, but with understanding. 

Today's Thought in Head

In all relationships, the depth of the relationship is decided by the party that wants it shallower. If A and B are in a relationship, A wants it to be a deep, intimate relationship while B wants it to remain shallow, it will, per force, have to remain shallow or break off, because B will not make the personal investment needed to deepen the relationship. A can then choose to sustain the relationship at that shallow level or break off. 

In families, romantic relationships, and even business relationships, this is true. 

The thing with this is, that only one person makes the decision to keep a relationship shallow, but both parties pay the price. Most long term relationships are like good eggs, they must either hatch (mature into something deeper) or go bad (break off). 

Over a long enough period, keeping a relationship shallow hurts both parties because there is, nonetheless, a human need for a deep connection. This is more pronounced in romantic relationships, because we are only allowed one romantic partner at a time. But even among siblings or with parents, there is an inherent need to have a deep relationship. If that need is frustrated by the current relationship, one must look elsewhere (but there is only one sibling/ parent!) or live with the feeling of lack of fulfillment. 

It is this lack of fulfillment, this constant feeling that we are living sub optimal lives, that fills us with an inexplicable void. Its inexplicable because we don't understand that we are living at a layer that is not in sync with our needs. 

How, then, does one deal with this? If so few people want to invest in deep relationships, whether at home (even parenting has become checklist based and transactional), or in friendships, then how does one find the deep connection that one seeks? 

A simple, but not so practical solution is to not be the person who holds up the depth in a relationship. You may not realise it right now, but you are going to need that depth. One day, you will be fifty, and friendless. Think of this as investing in a pension fund. You don't see the returns until you retire. Then, you get them when you need them the most. 

I have also found it to be true in the work sphere. Long term work relationships based on mutual respect. Long term vendor relationships mean that our cost of procurement goes down. Long term client relationships mean that our cost of selling is low, and we can give the client a better deal. 

In fact, Indian businesses typically demonstrate very long term employment and vendor-client relationships. 



Monday, October 18, 2021

Pashu Prem / पशु प्रेम

 गरीब लोग 

नहीं करते 

पशुओं से प्रेम 

वे कुत्तों से 

बचाते हैं 

अपने बच्चों को 

बंदरों से बचाते हैं 

अपने घरों को। 


अमीर

बसाते हैं 

पार्कों में कुत्ते

क्यूंकि 

उनका भी तो अधिकार है 

इस धरती पर 

उन पार्कों में 

जहां खेलने जाते थे 

गरीबों के बच्चे। 


अमीरों से पूंछ हिलाना 

और गरीबों पर गुर्राना 

कुत्ते भली भांति जानते हैं 

पार्क में आना 

छोड़ देते हैं 

गरीबों के बच्चे। 


This poem is based on a real situation. A community park near our house is taken over by stray dogs. So the slum children living near that park can no longer use even parts of the park to play. This pushes the children into unsafe playing areas. 

The people who feed these dogs in public areas claim that the dogs are sterilised but we see a litter periodically. They also do not adopt these dogs, but leave them in a public area which then becomes inaccessible to the rest of the community. There is blind authority with no accountability or responsibility. 

Sunday, October 17, 2021

On sexist jokes

कभी कभी मेरे दिल में ख्याल आता है, 

कभी कभी मेरे दिल में, ख्याल आता है 

कि अपने पिता से घृणा करने के बाद, 

हर पुरुष 

अपनी पत्नी को, 

ठीक वही दुख क्यूँ दिए जाता है? 

***** 

Well, if you call out a sexist joke, you are told to "take it light". 

So, I followed that advice and took it light. Here is my light hearted response to some of these sexist jokes. This is only one day's work. My creativity is on a roll! 



My updated meme: 



Joke on a group: 

My response: 



And the lines you read above are also in response to another sexist joke. 



How does one engage with the world?

 I really do try to engage with the world. But it feels like salt in a coffee cup.

Today, it was a post that supported a market that is based on encroachment. Friends who will support eco friendly wood shavings board on Facebook but ask for teak and sal for their own homes. Teak and Sal only grows on the mountains. The same friends will also go to the mountains and complain about deforestation.

They complain about poaching but buy hide purses from outside India.
The poacher's poverty is not poverty, but the encroacher's poverty is poverty.

They will post sexist jokes but will be offended if someone calls this out. OR, worse still (I do this) if someone makes reverse memes, they will be suitably offended.

What does one do with such mind-numbing hypocrisy? How does one engage with such a world?

I am a deep sea fish, i cannot live on the surface. It gets too hot and too cold too soon. It depends on the winds too much. It is affected by the current tide and gets muddy with a little rain. Deep down there, we have to trust each other. We have only each other. No tides come to change the mood. No winds and rains muddy the waters. The heat and cold is ours, and for a long time. We know there is noplace else to go. Just us. Just this. We are creatures of the long term.

Saturday, October 16, 2021

Dear Friends: Please do not read daily updates on Aryan Khan. The person is in jail and the due process of the law is being followed. please do not allow our media to add anguish to valid concern. his parents do not become less of a parent just because they have money. He does not become a lesser human being because he was remanded. Every human being deserves dignity. If you do not read, the media will not publish. Please do not write about Aryan Khan surviving on glucose biscuits or breaking down in a video call. Even he deserves the same dignity as the other accused. 

Thursday, October 07, 2021

You know exactly who this is

Just because he did not pull the trigger, does not mean he was not the killer. 

Just because he did not touch the money, does not mean he was not the one who held to ransom. He collected the ransom, all right. Then gave it to someone else. 




Monday, September 27, 2021

Understanding Colonisation

Chach Nama is the record of the first (?) Arab invasion of Sindh - 710 AD. 

I read this book with great interest and for a very personal reason. The book is written by the Arab chronicler, who was in the employ of Mohd. Bin Kasim. 

After reading the really long account of the victory of the Arabs against the mighty King Dahar, i shook my head in disbelief. Raja Dahar was so powerful that not only was he the Lord and Master of all he surveyed, he ruled all the way from Kashmir in the North to Makran in the West, Rajputana in the South - East. It was a massive kingdom that included all of the 5 rivers we proudly call Punj-ab. 

The land was fertile and wealthy. The military and technical prowess was great and at the start of the book, though it is written by the victor, the record of the Indian king is such that one believes that it is not possible for the Arabs to defeat this much power. Yet, a few months later, the mighty Raja Dahir is dead. Not just that, the dynasty is not even mentioned anywhere in Indian history. Sindh was a mighty land to the West of Hind, but it took an expert historian friend to recommend this book. Its not in the public discourse at all! (1)

So, how did the mighty Raja Dahir fall? 

The reason i put that book away in pure shock was the parallels. 

It was not just Raja Dahir who fell. No Hindu king could, subsequently, rule over those parts of India for at least a few centuries after that. 

The exact same thing happened to Kashmir. Once lost, it was never regained. 

The elements of colonisation 

The Islamic invasion and subsequent control of large parts of India and the world, was, in my view, the first wave of colonisation in recorded history. I call it the first wave of colonisation because: 
A. It was not localised. Large parts of the known world were systematically taken over. 
B. The power was political. 
C. The power was vested in people who were not the same as the people being ruled. In other words, the welfare of the ruled was not the primary concern of the ruling. OR, there was no self-rule.  


The subsequent colonisation 

There was a second colonisation. We know this one to be the main colonial movement. This one was led by trading companies originating in Europe. Almost as a pattern, trade relations or missionary movements were converted to political power. Once again, the 3 elements of colonisation make their appearance: 
A. Global 
B. Political Power 
C. The agenda of the rulers was not the welfare of the ruled. OR, there was no self-rule. 

So, this post has two parts. In the first part, I will try to present the common themes that emerge in the victory of the colonisers. 

The second part will compare the elements of the first two waves of colonisation with the third colonisation wave, that, I truly believe, is almost upon us. 

Why did the colonisers succeed? 

A. The Surprise Element 
In my study of riots, colonisation, and other forms of organised, group violence, information asymmetry is perhaps the MOST important element. It is this information asymmetry that leaves one side completely unprepared. 

In the times of Islamic colonisation, no one expected people to combine religion and political power. In the employ of Raja Dahir and indeed, every Hindu Raja in the subcontinent even in the modern ages, the armies were secular, the selection was based on merit and capability, and mercenaries were a recognised branch of fighters. 
Not in the Islamic colonisation. All the soldiers were Muslims. The glue holding them together was religion. Their motivation was religious conversion of the vanquished. No one expected this. No one expected large armies to seek and win political power on the basis of religion. Political battles were region to region. Sindh fought with Makran, Markan fought with Pashtoons, Sindh also fought with Rajputana, Rajputana fought with plateau kings and Central Indian kings, and so on. It was regional. Not religious. So, Raja Dahir prepared himself to fight the Afghani/ Arab army. Not a religious army. 

Likewise, in the 1600s , no one thought traders could ever want political power. They were profiteering idiots who would create their own facilities, warehouses, hold a small force to protect their wares, and pay taxes to make us rich. What will they do with power? That was the surprise element of the second colonisation. 

The surprise element of the third colonisation is that we view political power in terms of physical countries and their leadership. No one envisages countries that are virtual. No one imagines that political power is, at the end of the day, control over the minds of people, making them behave in a way that the ruler wants them to behave. This can be achieved by being the entity that makes laws. It can also be achieved by being the entity that decides WHO will make the laws, until we make laws ourselves (remember British India and their advisors to Indian rajahs) 

 B. Only one side had a strategy 
This is a corollary to the first cause. Because only one side knew that it was doing something for a very long-term impact, only one side had a strategy. The other side, after realising that it was being had (in case of Raja Dahir, after losing some key battles before the main battle in which he lost his life. In case of Native India, the rulers coming together to try to stop some of the powers of the trading companies. In case of China, countries trying to create some local manufacturing capability after realising that it cannot survive without China). 

C. A belief in invincibility and resulting complacence 
In all three cases, the existing political leadership displays a marked complacence that almost borders on insolence. 

D. An important missing piece 
In the Islamic colonisation, it was lack of unity. In the British colonisation, it was lack of latest warfare technology. In the most recent one, it is the lack of manufacturing capability and lack of new age citizen engagement features. There is usually an important missing piece - a vulnerability that the coloniser exploits. The vulnerability may not be important in itself, but when exploited by a coloniser, proves to be the Achilles' heel. 

So, what are we saying? 

What we are saying is very simple. We are looking at a third colonisation. It will come from China OR Big Tech. They are both ripe colonisers waiting to pounce. Or perhaps, both. The Dutch and the French and the British all ruled at the same time. The Turks and the Arabs and the Afghans, all ruled, though under the same major umbrella. In this case, one will rule on the premise of mind control thru tech, and the other will rule because they have created enough global infra now to pounce and seize. 

End of Post 
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(1)One reason could be that for some reason, Burma, Sindh, Punjab, and Afghanistan have been completely left out of India's history, as if they were never a part of a single political entity. Nothing is further from the truth. Burma was an integral part of India and formed our Eastern border. A lot of the talent for the Hindi film industry actually came from Burma.  People travelled to and from Burma - Bengal - Assam rather effortlessly. Sindh, of course, was part of India all the way till 1947. 

For Afghanistan: 

https://www.sidmartinbio.org/when-was-afghanistan-separated-from-india/.