शब्द

बचपन में 

बातूनी बहुत थी 

निबंध भी ये लंबे-लंबे लिखती थी 

शब्द सीमा का कभी आदर नहीं कर पाई। 

अब सब छू कर कहते हैं, 

"कुछ बोलो" 

और मेरे शब्द 

समाप्त हो गए 

बचपन में। 

Kshanika by someone else

जितना मुझे क्षणिकाओं से प्रेम है, जीवन का सार एक क्षणिका में ही मिलना था. 

किसी और की लिखी हुई है. किसने लिखी है, इस पर इंटरनेट एकमत नहीं हो पा रहा है.  तो पता नहीं किसने लिखी है. 

************ 

सूखे पत्तों की सिम्त बिखरे हुए थे हम 

एक शख्स ने समेटा 

और आग लगा दी. 

********** 

Some friendships are like chemistry - lots of fireworks, explosions even, and if among opposite genders, perhaps some chemistry..? 

Some are like physics. Lots of difficult problems that make no sense, and lots to do. 

Some are like Accountancy - always about profit and loss. 

Some are like maths - adding and reducing, multiplying and dividing... but somehow, never really adding up to much. 

Very few are real friendships.. just that.. friendships. 

Theater Review: Play: I Kabootar You

 

This play was staged at LTG Auditorium on last Sunday. Because the internet has a way of forgetting and these folks were unforgettable, let me first put the cast and crew here. 

Aryan Madhok and his team directed this superb adaptation of the Manav Kaul original and breathed new life into it. 

Shreshth as Salim and Divyakant as Raju clearly stood out. Uday as Pappu did very well too. 

While the acting was superb, the production quality was also remarkable. The lights (unfortunately, the name of the person on the lights was not shared with the audience) usually play a big role in the experience of a play, but in this case, they were even more so than usual. 

The live music on the stage added to the entire experience. The singing and Garv on Tabla was amazing. 

The show ended to a resounding applause. It was great fun to be there, and I wish there were more shows of this play. This does deserve to be staged again and again. 

If you catch members of this team performing anywhere, I would recommend them very highly. 

The music and choreo deserve special mention too, especially the dances by Ishan and Shreshth. 

Viewed from left, Meenakshi is the girl in the checkered skirt, to her right (in red shirt with a white vest) is Salim, next to them (green shirt) is the narrator, Red T shirt is Raju, who nailed the Haryanvi accent. These performers lit up the play. 

When your friends appear unhinged, the kindest thing to do is to cut the rope and let them go with the flow. 

Their boats need to find their homes on some very, very distant shores. 

******* 

When a face wants to leave a group photo, 

don't force them to disappear pixel by pixel. 

Allow them to use the erase function. 

********* 

प्रेम

मैंने प्रेम नहीं, उसका पात्र निभाया था। 

प्रेम में जो बातें लोग करते हैं, वे कही और सुनी थीं 

प्रेम में लोग जो करते हैं, वह किया था 

पर प्रेम में लोग जो महसूस करते हैं 

वह मुझ में नहीं हुआ 

स्वत: ही होता है 

स्वत: ही नहीं हुआ 

प्रेमी 

जान जाता है 

अंतत: 

जान गया था 

दुखी हुआ होगा उसका मन 

पर मैंने 

अभिनय नहीं किया था 

पता ही नहीं चला 

कि प्रेम में 

कुछ महसूस भी होता है। 

जो रिक्तता थी उसका 

रिक्त स्थान ही नहीं दिखा 

   

I said 

and heard  

all the things

that lovers say and hear 

and did 

all the things

that lovers do 

But did not feel 

what love feels like 

Eventually 

love realises

when it is not 

reciprocated 

It must have hurt 

but I was not deceitful 

I just never realised 

that one feels 

in love 

what one never feels 

outside it. 

I never saw 

the blank 

that love 

fills. 

The irony of it

जीवन की उपलब्धि यह है कि 

नया दुख दर्द नहीं है कोई 

अपने तो 

आँसू भी परसों के बासी हैं 

An underrated

but important blessing 

is that there is 

no new pain or hurt

even the tears 

are leftovers from day before. 

Sepsis

How to tell if someone might have sepsis: 

S for slow speech or confusion, 

E for extreme pain in the muscles or joints, 

P for passing no urine for 24 hours, 

S for severe breathlessness, 

I for “it feels like I’m going to die”, and 

S for skin that’s mottled, discoloured, blueish or very pale. OR purpura. 

- Most of this text is from an online article. Some points I have added basis our experience with sepsis. 

Some things are just not meant to be

many times 

we have tried. 

never once 

succeeded. 

too jagged our edges are 

to align 

On Texting

When friends text: 

1: You are a cherished friend. 

2: Awww!! 

1: And I love you a lot!

2: I love you a lot too! 

When old friends text: 

1: You are a cherished friend. 

2: 🤦‍♀️अब कौन सा कांड कर दिया तूने?

1: And I love you a lot!

2: अबे तुझे बुखार है?

Translation:

1: You are a cherished friend. 

2: 🤦‍♀️What did you get yourself into now?

1: And I love you a lot!

2: And you are not well?

Self Awareness of lack of self awareness

Today, I became aware of something very funny. 

When it comes to identification of emotions, I am like an infant. Or a toddler. 

I have very poor cognitive understanding of how I feel about someone. 

If I feel well around someone and unwell when they are not around, it means I love them. 

If I feel unwell around someone and well when they are not around, it means I should avoid them. 

It seems that amygdala, hippocampus, hypothalamus, or whatever part of the brain works on identification of emotions, is kind of dead for me. 

I have had to depend on "vibe" for some time now. Until today, when I realised that vibe is not a preferred method to identify emotions, it is now my only method. 

And in some surprising way, it feels ok. Like the loss of memory. The loss of cognitive ability.  And now, this loss of any analysis of emotions. 

I don't know if I can analyse the emotions of others. Till two weeks ago, one could. Who knows? 

PS: No, don't want advice. Just putting it out here.