Thursday, January 24, 2013

Inkaar - Film Review and the questions it raises

Inkaar is not a stellar film. In fact, as pure cinema, it will make no history. and box office records show probably not even a present. So why is it being reviewed?

Its being reviewed because one thing, and that one thing only, stood out. Loud and CLEAR.

When the lady announces her decision to accuse her boss of sexual harassment, the way she is treated:

The Super Boss: Business compulsions. Why are you doing this? we have done so much for you.

FEMALE Colleagues: Just sleep with him and get it over with.

Fiance: Why dont you quit? (Her response? I DESERVE This. why should i quit? Why indeed?)
Fiance: OK, u had a scene with him, dont think i dont know. (So, if i had a "scene" with him at one time, he can harass me now?)
Fiance: Its embarassing. I have clients in these locations. They will hear and its embarassing for me. (Really? Your fiancee getting harassed is not an embarassment, but she reporting it is?)

And this is painful because its REAL. Because when women around us talk about dowry harassment, eve teasing, office politics against them, sexual harassment, street harassment, we look away. even today. we wish they would come to terms with it and not speak so much about it. we wish they wouldnt demonise the people closest to them - their families - parental or marital. We wish it away. Like most other negative things.

So, look deeeeeeep inside you and tell me, how will you respond if you know of a female colleague you know accuses someone in office of sexual harassment? For the record, lets make her someone who is hot looking, dresses well, and does not mind speaking her mind - even (hawwww!!) even around men. What will you say - to her, and in  your head??

5 comments:

Pooja Priyamvada said...

When we support a woman on any kind of sexual harassment issue we are breaking the ice of centuries of silence,and workplace harassment is not new earlier it happened in fields and barns and now in board rooms.

Anonymous said...

Not seen the movie... however I guess even a slight change in our mental conditioning will take all the effort in this world

Manish Raj said...

Obviously you aren't even thinking of a reversed (gender) scenario of harassment. Perhaps because such 'Super'woman (like Demi Moore/ Disclosure) exist only in movies ?

Anyway, I will tell such colleague to be aware of the 'line' she drew for that male colleague or boss. If he has crossed that line; invoke all her strengths (physical and mental) to bring him to justice.

It is important that one makes the other person aware of 'that' line because sometimes it does move depending on who the other person is. I live in the same world HDWK.

Good women are equally rare as good men are..and vice versa. Answers aren't beyond ourselves.

Cheers
Manish




Saintly Sita said...

I think women need to create supporting spaces where other women can talk about the issues plaguing their lives.

I have dealt with so many issues alone and isolated, an unequal marriage that ended in divorce, a boss who harrassed me because he thought divorced women are easy, the stigma a divorced woman encounters in Indian society, street sexual harrassment and the everyday challenges of living as a woman in India.

After my divorce, female friends from college and from the social circle my ex and I had, chose to distance themselves because it isn't cool to be friends with a divorced woman.

What I'm trying to say is: Women have to unlearn the deep conditioning that makes us treat other women as pariahs and outcasts. Every woman suffers from gender-based equality and she always suffers alone.

That hurts the most. That women do not support other women who need support and validation.

How do we know said...

Hi Pooja: yes, board rooms, and politics, and every other domain.

Hi fotofreak: no. the change starts with US. with you and me. inside us. to challenge our own comfort zone of ideas and beliefs.

Hi Guruji: "Good women" ?? does that mean women who do not harass male colleagues and / or solicit romantic attention? yeah, the nomadic working world is slightly complicated. i agree.

Hi Saintly Sita: yes. i soooo know where u r coming from. a single or divorced woman is easy game. and for that reason alone, a lot of women continue to live in a facade. bcs a facade provides security. its sick.