http://thoughtcatalog.com/2012/my-mother-my-rape-and-me/
We cannot understand what it is like to be raped. We cannot know it unless it happens to us. When a house is burgled, we can move away from the house and try to remove the memories, make a fresh start. But when it happens to your body.. the defeat.. and the powerlessness above all else, stays with you for the rest of your life.
What can we do for rape?
50 years ago, if a boy eve teased, and the girl raised her slippers, the rest of the street joined her in beating up the boy. The complaint would reach his house where his ashamed parents would apologise to the community and hit the boy black and blue. "aapke ghar mein bhi behan beti hai" was euphimism for "it can happen to anyone. including you, unless you stop your son from doing it to others now."
Today, ppl snigger when a girl is eve teased or even probed in public. shifty eyes wait to see how far the set of hands can go before the embarassed girl gets off the bus or the street or whatever. physical violence against women who "break the norm" is considered "ok."
When you see someone eve tease, join others in shaming him. even if it takes 2 minutes of your time. that meeting is not as important as this.
At the very least, we can take the blanket of shame that is put on the victim and put it on the perpetrator. Do not meet ppl socially if you know they have been in a crime like this. Yes, they are moneyed and a thousand other ppl will step in to fill your shoes. But it wont be you. And thats important.
We cannot understand what it is like to be raped. We cannot know it unless it happens to us. When a house is burgled, we can move away from the house and try to remove the memories, make a fresh start. But when it happens to your body.. the defeat.. and the powerlessness above all else, stays with you for the rest of your life.
What can we do for rape?
50 years ago, if a boy eve teased, and the girl raised her slippers, the rest of the street joined her in beating up the boy. The complaint would reach his house where his ashamed parents would apologise to the community and hit the boy black and blue. "aapke ghar mein bhi behan beti hai" was euphimism for "it can happen to anyone. including you, unless you stop your son from doing it to others now."
Today, ppl snigger when a girl is eve teased or even probed in public. shifty eyes wait to see how far the set of hands can go before the embarassed girl gets off the bus or the street or whatever. physical violence against women who "break the norm" is considered "ok."
When you see someone eve tease, join others in shaming him. even if it takes 2 minutes of your time. that meeting is not as important as this.
At the very least, we can take the blanket of shame that is put on the victim and put it on the perpetrator. Do not meet ppl socially if you know they have been in a crime like this. Yes, they are moneyed and a thousand other ppl will step in to fill your shoes. But it wont be you. And thats important.
6 comments:
Very correct
Eve teasing makes it sound trivial, don't you think? Teasing sounds warm and affectionate, and it's no such thing. Over here, it's known as sexual harassment.
Just slam them publicly.. on other option works HDWK
oops NO*
Onkar sir: Thank you!
Z: yes, it does trivialise the issue. Sexual harassment is the right word.
Hi GB: yes. public shaming belongs to the perpetrator for all crimes except rape -where suddenly, the shame lies with the victim!
This past week has been mental health and wellness awareness campaign here in Ontario Universities. A huge part is sexual health and my heart cried at how many individuals have been sexually assaulted. I'm glad you took the time to help with the awareness.
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