Thursday, May 22, 2008

More Lessons from being a parent

The umbilical cord is never cut. I now understand that about my own mother, my husband's mother, and the child..
*********************
At night, suddenly, he wants to be held ever so tightly, and sleeps blissfully in your arms. Barely 15 minutes later, he is kicking away the embrace and screaming in his sleep to be allowed to sleep "free".. never mind that in about half an hour, he wants the embrace again ;-)
There is a smile, son, as one realises that this is a pattern that we are going to have to follow for a long, long time to come. When you want to be close and be hugged and accepted, we will be there. When you want your space, we will have to respect that too. Our parents have been doing that for ages, and its payback time.. I smile again..

Update on Ishaan :
We started homeopathy, and he is better. BIG thanks to everyone who convinced us that homeopathy is the way to go, and a special thanks to the person who recommended this doctor. More on that later.

24 comments:

~nm said...

:D Yes, its payback time :)

Good that its working well for him. Touch wood!

santhosh said...

:)
Easily the most beautiful post I've read this week.. Me all smiles and I've been re-reading this like every 2 mins. It's a beautiful day!

Swati said...

Nice thought ..Lovely post.

Good that Ishaan is better now

Z said...

Sometimes, it's the letting go that's the hardest, isn't it?

RJ said...

Oh so true! And I keep begging my son for hugs and kisses.

Chiya said...

:) sounds like the good part.

Bobbb - Citizen of Earth said...

Teach
Your parents well…

The days flow
The future knows
Where we came from
And where we go

Do not rush the days
Take each one slow
Cherish each moment
As you watch them grow

unpretentious said...

like Z said, the hardest thing is letting go. somehow this post has brought a smile:) its a miracle how a person is accepted by his parents alone and very rarely by others in the whole world.

oh n Ishann is a beautiful name:)

dharmabum said...

such a beautiful post, HDWK, so simply and elegantly captures the most beautiful relationship in the world.

parents are a boon - there is so much we take for granted, yet, they are there, and we live in the comfort of that knowledge.

brocasarea said...

wish him [Ishaan] good luck:)...as far as i know from clinical exposure]..the only cure for atopic eczema[which is a type of allergy like asthma] is to avoid the facter which causes it[so try to find it out!!]...steroids and all will help but in the long run it compromises his immunity[not if given locally on the skin!]...get well soon ishaan:)

How do we know said...

Hi ~nm: Touch Wood! :-)

Hi Santhosh: :-) Thanks! Yes, it is a set of beautiful days!

Hi swati: Thanks for both!

Hi z: Yes, so it is.... and when the time comes in earnest, i will turn to you again.. :-)

Hi rj: Mee too! Me too!!

Hi Chiya: A little bit of sugar and spice in everything :-)

How do we know said...

Hi Bobb: This is sooo wonderful! Thank you!
Teach
Your Parents Well

.. cldnt put it better!

Hi unpretentious: Thanks! And yes, when i get there..

Hi Dharma: How have u been? And yes, parents are always there... :-)

Hi brocasarea: Yep, so it is... his dermatologist also tells me that this can be because of his harmones etc..

S.M.A.R.T said...

That's one beautiful post, written straight from the heart :)

(¯`•._.•[Raaji]•._.•´¯) said...

this is an awesome post :-)

.. and very true :-)

The Phosgene Kid said...

Glad Ishaan is doing better!!!

wisegirl said...

that's exactly what my mom says... still don't get it!

adi said...

sometimes, even the parents do not understand what you need, what you feel...what to do then? is it then the 'true love' comes into picture? are soul mates better at understanding you than a parent?

human being said...

great post
yes that ever-existing cord...

and i relate much to Adi, too...
if a parent doesn't let the child have those free spaces?

we should learn much...

human being said...

ah i forgot to say how happy i am to hear Ishaan is doing better....
i really believe in homeopathy... glad it helped.

How do we know said...

hi s.m.a.r.t: Yep, so it is, and am glad u like it.

Hi Raaji: Thank you. And how have u been?

Hi Phos: Am glad too ;-)

Hi wisegirl: Someday, u might. Since u r a girl, am tempted to say, some day you will..

How do we know said...

Hi adi: i thought long and hard about this one. You always do ask the most thought provoking questions.

My feeling is that parents are not always able to keep pace with our steps as we grow. This is where the soul mate comes in.

It is not one or the other. Its like running a race with your friends while your parents watch from the gallery, cheering us on all the time.

How do we know said...

Hi Human being: yes, it is one thing to read Gibran and to feel that we are the bows through which the arrows fly, quite another to give the arrow the freedom to go on its own.

Whenever I see this, i remember a quote by Vivekananda. He says "Love can never make you sad. Love can never give pain. If you love, then your happiness is in seeing the other person happy. Where is the pain in that? Pain comes when you are attached to possessing the person, and not to the happiness of the person. Possession is not love." something to that effect. I always remember this quote when i get pain in love. :-) Not always easy, but always helpful.
And thanks for sharing our ups and downs with Ishaan :-)

human being said...

parents the bow and children the arrows... Gibran has put it well...

and thanks so much for the wonderful quote by Vivekananda...
great words... enlightening
i should send it to a young friend who is in 'pain' with love...
:)
this is what Erich Fromm discusses in his book 'The Art of Loving'

love to you, HDWK
kiss Ishaan for me.

Seema said...

You will be surprised to see my comment here but you forced me to write. You are simply amazing. I knew that you analyze relationships a lot, but never knew that you are gifted with putting it so well in words. Now I can understand better when you say that you are busy dear :). My wishes for Ishaan are always there and I am coming soon to bless him :).